First, it is important to note that I hate when people wait until the very first of the year to do anything. There is absolutely no reason not to start quitting something, exercising, learning something new, etc. because the Farmer’s Alamanc says the stars are in line for that sort of change on January 1 of the new year and not on November 3 of the previous one. To me, that appears to be nothing more than a bunch of rubbish loaded in the binding of a nonsensical book.
For the past few weeks, I have been trying to integrate exercise into my weekly routine. I pulled out one of those workout videos from the shelf and started “jammin'” every other day, or at least when it would fit into the schedule. When I can, I run with Aries around the block, or before she decides to halt and poop along our path. It is a little hard to run with a dog who is preoccupied with wanting to sniff or eat the poop of other dogs left along the roadside (no, we do not let her eat it thanks – I was even kind enough to rip a Frito out of her mouth this morning).
Dave wants me to try and run a half marathon. Before all of this is even possible, I need to be able to run at a relatively good pace for a mile, which does not currently happen. Right now, I run moderately for a little bit and come to a walk soon after it feels like my lungs are burning. My problem is split in a few parts. First, I am a little asthmatic. When I run, my esphogas will swell up and make it difficult for me to breathe. Second, I have no idea if the pain is normal and should be taken with another stride or if it is a symptom of an asthma attack coming on. Third, I plain old don’t like pain because I was taught that pain and discomfort does not reap anything – or at least it never seems to.
For these reasons, running is up against a hard mental block in me. I want very bad to be one of those people I see running on the bike path, their breath coming out in clouds in the morning. While it is barely reaching the notch of 30 degrees Fahrenheit, they can still wear tiny, thin shorts and tank tops. The only semblance of winter warmth on their bodies is the little stretchy gloves covering their heads and a skull cap shielding their heads. But I am slow and haphazard; my running looks sloppy without cadence. Their pain seems to be a small gloss over their eyes, while mine is stretched across my face and in the grimace of my mouth.
Really, there is a lot to be said for someone who can meet their running goals and make it through a 5k without breaking up with their significant other (oh yes, I have done that). I continually fear that my own discomfort and fear of pain will always keep me from being as healthy and in shape as I would like to be. My goal for this year, I suppose would be to overcome the fear and ignore the discomfort that comes with running. I want to be a strong, healthy woman, and that does not come alone with physical capacity. One has to be mentally strong, also.
Here is to 2007 and the mental and physical toughness that hopefully comes with running a half-marathon sometime this year.